Meet Rachel Shaw
Age: 25
From: Layton, Utah
Family: 5 younger siblings (1 sister and 4 brothers); engaged
Major: Math Education from UVU
Job: Junior High Seventh Grade Math Teacher
Hobbies: Singing, dancing, taking dance classes including clogging; joining choirs and spending time outdoors
Missions: Birmingham England 2018-2019 and Nauvoo 2022
Check out her story and learn tips on how to prepare for an LDS mission!
What was the process like for you in deciding whether to serve a mission or not?
I had a lot of female examples who served missions beforehand, including my mom and most of my aunts on my mom’s side, and my older cousins as well. With those connections and the age change, it was like “Oh, duh, I’ll serve a mission.” (In 2012, it was announced that young women could serve missions at age nineteen instead of twenty-one, see source below for more details).
My patriarchal blessing also talked about me having an opportunity to serve a mission, so it was never a question of if I’ll serve or not. The hardest thing was finding out where I was going to serve [in England]. I didn’t feel ready or wanted to serve in a place that traditionally I’ve heard has more clouds and harder weather. I also heard the people there are less open and that I’d face constant rejection.
To prepare for my mission, I got familiar with God’s word and developed a better relationship with Him. I also tried to be okay with going to a place I didn’t want to serve in originally.
What was hard about serving a mission?
The hardest part in England was not typical of every missionary, but I realized I was dealing with mental health for the first time. I didn’t realize beforehand in college that I was dealing with anxiety and depression. It wasn’t until my mission that I fully accepted and came to terms with, and worked through, this hard mental health struggle.
One of the biggest things that began my healing process was understanding God’s character. Beforehand, I thought He just had these incredibly high expectations of me, and if I didn’t fulfill those expectations, then He would be disappointed in me as a missionary and as his daughter.
But one day I woke up on the mission full of hopelessness and despair, and I was sitting there crying, thinking that I can’t even get out of bed. I remember still saying my morning prayers. I told God, “I’m sorry I’m not the missionary I’m supposed to be, sitting here in my bed, wasting your time.” And I never get this kind of answer, where it’s a really clear thought in my brain, so clearly from the Lord. I heard this really strong thought, “I will love you if you sit on your bed and cry, or if you go out and do missionary work. My love for you doesn’t change based off of that.”
This was a turning point where I came to understand His character more, started to involve Him in the healing process more, and came to trust Him more. That experience [and the continued process after that] became one of the hallmarks of my mission and growth in general, learning Christ’s character.
When I went to Nauvoo, one of the things I struggled with the most was comparison. I compared my level of talent with others’ level of talent, and I felt unqualified, since I came in with less training than others. But I also compared myself spiritually, how I shared the gospel, and socially, my ability to connect with the other missionaries or the guests who came. I compared myself a lot in that.
While comparison was a struggle throughout my mission, I had learned a concept called reality testing that helped me. I’d examine a comparison thought and ask myself, or write about it in my journal: Is that true? For example, I’d have the thought, “This sister is better at making friends than I am.” Then I’d take time, and remember that this is what it looks like for her, but this is what it looks like for me. I’d remind myself that I’m really good when I start a conversation and engage with someone and make them feel valued as a person. So reality testing involved recognizing the other sister’s strengths as well as my own. At the end of the day, I’m valued and extraordinary even if I think someone else has a greater strength than I do. (To learn more about managing comparison, read YOMO! You Only Mission Once: A Guide for Sister Missionaries, coming out in spring of 2025).
What did you love about your mission?
In England, I loved finally understanding, experiencing, and watching a dramatic change of heart. When I got to England, I thought to myself, “I’m sorry, but these people are way too stubborn, no way their heart will change.” I had such a fixed mindset about that.
My companion and I were teaching a woman who had several adult children, and she was on date for baptism. She was a strong, firm, and dedicated disciple of Christ. She’s amazing! Her son would sometimes listen to conversations, but he’d say, “I’m a spiritualist,” and he’d wear black clothing all the time. He was a little socially awkward, too. My companion and I would say, “You know, when other members of this sister’s family join the church, this son will be last.”
When I got a new companion, the first time we met with this family again, this young man said, “Hey sisters, I started reading the Book of Mormon and I prayed, and I want to start taking the discussions.”
I was mind blown. I was like, “There’s no way!” Over the course of a few months, we saw this boy who wore all black and was weird and had a lot of darkness around him bring in so much light. I’d never seen this transformation before. The gospel of Christ, and the Savior himself, actually does change people. I was so mind blown by that. It was a crucial experience for me in England, that really redefined God for me and our potential, and who we are as human beings. It was really cool!
In Nauvoo, my favorite part was similar. Even though it was a very different mission, we’d watch people change. People usually come to Nauvoo to stay for a few days, and we’d meet them one day, but there’d be certain people or families who’d come to shows more often, or we’d notice them and talk to them more. There were many times where they didn’t have to tell me, but I saw them change as they came. I even saw it in my family members when they came. It started out as “oh, it’s a church history trip” or whatever, but by the end of it, they had just created Zion in their family, youth group, etc. They had so much light and helped people feel welcome and just loved others. It’s so crazy that I was part of that transformation process, and that I got to be an instrument in the Lord’s hands by performing. It’s so crazy that I got to share God’s love through performing, and that love allowed others to change and become more like Him.
Can you describe what life was like as a Nauvoo Performing Missionary?
We start out by just auditioning. There’s several hundred who audition to be singers, dancers, band members, or technicians. There’s a callback process, and both the auditions and the callbacks are so inspired on who they call. So many sisters were more talented and experienced than I was and they weren’t called. It’s like the Lord needed me there for that summer. It was really cool to see how talent played a role, but at the end of the day, it was who the Lord needed there.
We flew out to Nauvoo, and the first three weeks we learned 7 different shows, 50 songs, and 9-12 high intensity, difficult dances to a level I’d never done before. I was asked to play guitar and learn a few songs on the guitar as well. These 3 weeks are basically like your MTC training in a very different way! No matter how much skill or experience you have, you’ll be overwhelmed, but just like with any missionary experience, the Lord comes in and blesses you with the gift of tongues, and you learn things so quickly that you shouldn’t have been able to learn. You are given so much strength and ability from the Lord.
After these 3 weeks, we open up our shows. Every single day from about 10am to 8-10pm you’re performing. Every day I would do 7-12 shows, some were 1-1.5 hours and others were 15 minutes. We had time for meals and still had missionary responsibilities, including personal study and companionship study. Sometimes, our study schedule had to be modified, because of early morning rehearsals, but we made it a priority to read the scriptures and discuss what we read in our personal study, even at lunch. We were told, “You are a missionary first, a performer second.” The more that missionaries embraced that vision, the better missionary and performer they were.
Also, we got to be a part of the Nauvoo and British pageant in July. Professional actors come, and families from all over the United States come to be in the ensemble. The pageant portrays the building up of Nauvoo and the establishment of the Church in England. In the beginning of August, we head home, so it’s a three-month mission.
After every single show, we have time to talk to the audience. Sometimes we have 5 minutes, other times up to 20 minutes. We don’t have to be directly talking about the gospel, but at the end of the day, visitors feel love from missionaries who are representing Jesus Christ, who are just genuinely interested in their lives. It was a tool of conversion, the love that they felt and that they recognized comes from Jesus Christ.
What did you learn on the mission about yourself and about God?
In England, one thing I learned is that I don’t have to be perfectly okay to be an instrument in God’s hands. On the days when I felt so broken and so dysfunctional, and my 100% looked like other people’s 5%, and I didn’t see any change happen, I learned after my mission that I had made a difference. In conversations after my mission with people in England, they’d tell me, “You made such a difference,” and they’d give specifics, and it was at times that I felt so broken. I was like, “You were changed because of what I did?” It was so incredible to see.
I learned about God and His character, how He gives us weaknesses, so that we can come to know Him. He never intended for weaknesses to stay as weaknesses, but our weaknesses are intended to become strengths through Him. Every time we feel shame, guilt, or embarrassment because of our weaknesses, we don’t need to, because they weren’t an accident. Our mortal experience is not an accident. Its purpose is to bring us closer to Jesus Christ, as in come to know our Savior better and really experience His healing and what He can do.
In Nauvoo, the biggest thing I learned about myself is that the Lord never intended for me to be mediocre. Even though at times I felt mediocre or I felt I wasn’t capable, it was never the Lord’s intention. The Lord was able to work miracles through me, and make me into something I never believed I could be. And it wasn’t just a better dancer, which did happen, or a better singer, which did happen, or a better actor, which did happen, but I was blessed with amazing gifts, such as becoming someone who was more capable of experiencing and finding joy in everyday life. That was a gift I was given in Nauvoo.
Also, faith makes miracles. The Lord has mighty miracles in store, and we are capable of being instruments in His hands to make those miracles happen. Never doubt that those miracles can take place, especially when you’re bringing the Lord into it and putting effort into it.
Your advice on: How to prepare for an LDS mission?
Get to know Jesus Christ better and really come to understand who He is, His role in your life, and how his Hand, or even how His fingerprints, are in your life every single day. At the end of the day, I think it’s important to be familiar with the gospel, Preach My Gospel, and His word, but you need to build your rock on Jesus Christ first. Build your foundation on Him, and everything will come into place. If you can build your foundation on Him, whatever storms come naturally as a missionary, you will not fall. Coming to know your Savior is the best preparation. (See Helaman 5:12).
Do you have any advice for sisters who come home earlier than they expected?
The biggest advice I’d give to those who see themselves as coming home early is that the Lord always knew how long you were going to serve. You were told in the letter from the prophet that you are called to serve an 18-month mission, but the Lord had a specific length of time always in mind.
In my patriarchal blessing, it said the timing and circumstances of my mission would be made very clear, and I never understood what that meant. When I got a call from my mission president 6 months into my mission telling me, “Sister Shaw, it’s time to go home,” that line from my blessing came to my mind, and it was like the Lord knew when I was 15 years old, that my mission was going to be 6 months.
The time that you are out on the mission is exactly the time the Lord had prescribed for you to serve. Don’t forgot you served a full-time mission. During the time you were serving, you were a full-time missionary. You gave your heart, might, mind, and strength to the Lord through prayer, scripture study, and testifying. Even if the time span looked different for you than for others, your mission and your timing was always what the Lord had in mind.
Source about age change: https://newsroom.churchofjesuschrist.org/article/president-thomas-s-monson-announced-lower-age-requirement-for-missionary-service
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